I heart camp.
This summer is a challenge. The dean of the camp that I counseled last week encouraged us to write down some of the stories so that we don't forget them and because story telling is part of life and of keeping faith alive. I agree with him, but I'm afraid the things that I have been learning and experiencing do not work well in story form. God has been moving and it's been incredible to see him break through to kids in the last few weeks.
This last camp, though. Man... I did not come back the same person at all. Some of it had to do with watching middle schoolers totally school me on what it means to be compassionate. Some of it had to do with feeling more at home at camp than I do in Milbank (even though I've lived here nearly a year.) Some of it has to do with finally connecting to other young leaders in the Dakotas Conference Methodist Church after a year of feeling like an outcast. Some of it has to do with my complacency in my own spiritual life and being challenged to step up in what I am leading students to do and think.
Over the last year one of the biggest hardships I faced was the feeling of being alone. This last week at camp put that in sharp relief. I was a part of a team of active Christians with different perspectives, passions and ideas for what God can do and does do in the world. Left on my own, my concept of God tends to shrink. I don't give him much credit or expect him to work. My attitude throughout the year had been - I'm going to try this and if something good comes of it, then great... if not - oh well. This week I realized that God can and will do amazing things with teenagers - if I trust Him. If I lead them to trust Him.
I am grateful for the camping ministry because it changed my life. I am who I am because of camp. Camp breaks down my walls and prepares me to listen to that still small voice of God. It is camp that provides that place set apart where my body and mind are trained to focus on God and to re-center my life around Him. It's not that camp is the only place to encounter God - it's just the most powerful memories I have of God so I am actually listening when I am there.
Like I said, not really stories. But they are truths and the truths about who I am and who I have been. As I look forward to this next year I pray that I am not the same person this time next summer as I am right now.
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